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Somedays, the supply of available curse words is insufficient to meet my demands.
It's called KARMA, and it's pronouced 'haha f*ck you'
If swearing burned calories, I'd weigh like 8 pounds
Stressed spelled backward is desserts. Coincidence?
Hold my dignity ... I've got some sketchy sh*t to do
Buffet: a french word for f*cking get it yourself.
You call them swear words. I call them sentence enhancers.
I'm a sarcastic ray of f*cking sunshine.
INHALE the good shit, EXHALE the bullshit
Let me pour you a tall glass of 'Get Over It"
Off is the general direction in which I wish you would f*ck
hot chocolate made with Mexican cocoa topped with marshmellows and drizzles of chocolate and carmel syrup

Como agua para Chocolate (Alcohol-infused Mexican Hot Chocolate)

Como Agua para Chocolate (Alcohol-Infused Mexican Hot Chocolate) You’re going to love this Mexican Hot chocolate, infused with flavors of Kahlua, cinnamon, nutmeg, and cayenne.   This hot chocolate is comforting as it should be, but also spicy and seductive. Como agua para Chocolate (Like Water for Chocolate) is a novel by Laura Esquivel, about a young woman, Tita, who is passionately in love with Pedro.  Unfortunately, Tita’s mother forbids the relationship.  When Pedro marries Tita’s sister, Tita pours her heartbreak into her cooking, infusing all who eat the food with her intense feelings. This story is about a struggle between

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Cocktails

ver based cocktail

Reconstituted VERgin

September 28, 2022

Reconstituted VERgin The Reconstituted VERgin is a lovely multi-layered spritz with notes of herbs, spices, seeds, bark, mint, and the sparkle of Prosecco.  Bubbles and

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Appetizers

peach slices on whipped feta topping a roasemary foccacia toast point

Whip It Good

September 14, 2022

Whip it Good Roasted or grilled peaches, and feta on a toasted crostini.  Yum! Whip it- Whip it good.  It’s almost impossible not to sing

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Desserts

almond flavored canoli filling piped into a martini glass with crushed patachios and chocolate shavings with pastry chips

Unholy Cannoli (Boozy Cannoli)

August 24, 2022

Unholy Cannoli You will love this deliciously sinful and deconstructed Cannoli with Amaretto custard cream, chocolate, and pistachios. This recipe features air-fried cannoli chips.  No

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flat bread pizza recipe with arugula, prosciutto, figs, gorgonzola, carmelized onions
Good Pizza A$$
Masterbaker club

Picture if you will...

Cuss Kitchen began by accident in 2019, when friends gathered to unwind with cocktails and delicious homemade appetizers and desserts. Above the laughter, someone suggested that we have a test kitchen to share recipes. This was followed by the somewhat confused response, “What? We’re doing a Cuss Kitchen!”

As good friends with cocktails do, we rolled with it. Soon all the polite conversation turned a little…colorful, as we gave recipes racy new names, and shared hilariously inappropriate ideas for others… and the Cuss Kitchen Party became a reality.

This website is a collection of our fun  parties that we wanted to share with everyone.  We invite everyone out there to join the fun.  Use our recipes for your next celebration or submit a recipe to the blog.  Don’t forget to include a picture of the dish or your party so we all can have some fun.

If we publish your recipe, you will be entered into our monthly drawing for some special merch.  If you become a regular contributor, you have the chance to become part of the MasturBakerAF 5 Stars Club.  MasturBakerAFs sport exclusive merch that shows everyone that you’re special AF.

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Explore Our Recipes

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Work With Us

Creating fun, flavorful recipes perfect for a girls night out, celebrating a divorce, engagement, bridal shower. Our audience is expanding rapidly, and we are looking to the future with continued growth as we add more branded merchandise and curated menus.  Even Fun costs money these days.

Cuss Kitchen accepts forms of cash advertising, sponsorship, paid insertions or other forms of compensation. As an affiliate ad publisher, we earn from qualifying purchases.

This blog abides by word of mouth marketing standards. We believe in honesty of relationship, opinion and identity.

Cuss Kitchen - Not your grandmas recipes
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