Watermelon Spritzer cocktail

Smashed Diva Cocktail (Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktail)

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Smashed Diva Cocktail

The watermelon is ‘smashed’…Will you be? Noooooo not from this Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktail

Unless you find them delicious and drink a completely inappropriate number

smiley face drawingDISCLAIMER:  and we do say this lovingly…our CUSStomers and our favorite Divas do seem to like ‘Inappropriate’!

 

Try this lovely sparkling watermelon cocktail with Limoncello and fresh basil… You divas!

 

Are you a Diva Test?

How many of these questions describe YOU?

  1. You have lip gloss in various easy to grab places (Maybe even in your bra?)
  2. You tend to arrive ‘Fashionably’ late (FABULOUS takes time Bitches!)
  3. Your phone background has a fashionable picture of you (Duh)
  4. You wear heels when others are in flip flops (Channeling an Inner-Hoochie?)
  5. You own more than 15 pairs of shoes (Are you freaking kidding?)
  6. You are the first to notice what everyone is wearing (or wearing again!)
  7. You believe there are not enough ‘Spa Days’ in the year (Ahhhh)
  8. You spend way too much for frickin’ coffee (OMG)
  9. You love making your opinions heard (because everyone truly values them)
  10. Buying expensive sh#t sparks joy!
  11. You take way too long to get ready (but you’re F’ckn Worth It)
  12. “Bitchin”, “Bossy”…. just means you’re a Bad-A$$ leader

 

Sassy Cuss Kitchen Merchandise

Heavy kitchen towel that says "If Swearing Burned Calories, I'd Be One Skinny Bitch"

 

 

Smashed?  What an interesting phrase?

What are other funny names for getting drunk?

Turns out there are many interesting and sometimes graphic terms for getting drunk:

Hammered, Plowed, Wasted…Upholstered? (Alarming)

Skunked, Steamed, Toasted, Schwasted, F*cked-up, Wrecked, Shitfaced, Pickled and Embalmed (So Disturbing)

 

When all else fails tell them to supercalifuckilistic kissmyassadocious and have a cocktail

Why will you love this Cocktail?

  • The combination of watermelon, Limoncello, Rose Prosecco, and Basil makes a fresh and tasteful cocktail
  • 5 minutes to make!
  • So refreshing on a hot summer day

 

Ingredients

  • Watermelon
  • Limoncello
  • Agave
  • Rose Prosecco
  • Fresh Basil

What kind of watermelon is best?

Use seedless watermelon. Seedless watermelon may still have small white seeds, but you just want to make sure it doesn’t have the big black seeds.  Also you don’t need a large quantity of watermelon- a few slices will work for several cocktails.

If you’re buying a watermelon, how do you know if it’s a good one?

  • Find the field spot, it should be a yellowish creamy color on the outside where the watermelon had been resting on the ground.
  • Dull looking watermelons are better; shiny melons are not yet ripe.
  • Knock on it with your knuckles; the surface should be hard/firm. A dull thud indicates the flesh inside is getting old
  • Get the heaviest one for its size; water is heavy and a lot of water in a watermelon is a positive indicator!
  • You want uniform shape – round or oval is fine…irregular edges might indicate an inconsistent water source
Watermelon Spritzer cocktail
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5 from 15 votes

Smashed

Sparkling Rose and Watermelon Cocktail
Prep Time10 minutes
Total Time10 minutes
Course: Drinks
Cuisine: American
Keyword: Booty Call, Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktail, Rose Prosecco Cocktail, Sparkling Rose, Sparkling Rose and Watermelon Cocktail, Sparkling Rose Cocktail, sparkling rose drink, Sparkling wine, sparkling wine cocktail, Watermelon and Limoncello Cocktail, Watermelon Cocktail
Yield: 2
Author: U. R. Shitinmey

Equipment

  • Ninja Blender
  • Champagne Flutes

Materials

  • 6 oz Watermelon Approximately 8 cubes or 2 slices
  • 2 oz Limoncello
  • ½ oz Agave
  • 6 oz Rose Prosecco or Sparkling Rose
  • ½ leaf Fresh Basil (Finely chopped)
  • Ice

Instructions

  • Fill your Ninja Blender cup with approximately 8 cubes of watermelon
  • Blend, and add watermelon until you have 6 ounces of puree (Strain for seeds)
  • Add the watermelon puree to a cocktail shaker
  • Add Limoncello, and Agave to the cocktail shaker
  • Add ice cubes and shake
  • Use the cocktail shake to fill each flute 1/2 full
  • Top off each flute with Rose Prosecco
  • Sprinkle finely chopped basil
  • Garnish with a watermelon wedge
  • Serve

Hey Autocorrect quit tampering with my curse words, Mother Forklift

Watermelon spritzer
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5 from 8 votes

Smashed Batch

Pitcher of Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktails
Prep Time15 minutes
Total Time15 minutes
Course: Drinks
Cuisine: American
Keyword: Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktail, Watermelon Spritz
Yield: 8

Equipment

  • Ninja or Blender

Materials

  • 24 oz Watermelon Puree
  • 8 oz Limoncello
  • 2 oz Agave
  • 2 leaves Basil
  • 24 oz Rose Prosecco
  • Ice

Aphrodesi’hacks’ for a Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktail- Smashed!

  • Buy the freshest watermelon you can find
  • Be sure your Rose Prosecco is well chilled before you begin
  • Use a triangle of melon, sprig of basil, or sprig of fresh mint as a garnish

FAQ’s for a Rose Prosecco and Watermelon Cocktail

 

Can I make this cocktail alcohol-free?

Absolutely.  Use an alcohol-free Prosecco, and lemonade or a lemon twist instead of Limoncello.

 

Can I prepare this drink ahead of time?

For best results mix all ingredients except for the Prosecco.  Refrigerate your mix, and add the bubbles to your spritzer at the last minute.

 

The mixture separated in the refrigerator, what should I do?

It is natural for fresh watermelon juice to separate in the refrigerator- just give it a good stir before pouring that fruity melon goodness in your garnished glasses.

 

Could I use watermelon ice cubes in this drink?

Yes- that is a beautiful way to serve this watermelon spritz cocktail.  If you are planning to use 1 or 2 cubes, you may want to reduce the watermelon puree in your mix by 1 oz per ice cube used.  Don’t overdo the watermelon ice cubes- and be sure the cubes will fit in the glasses you are planning to use for serving.

 

Can I add sugar or a simple syrup in this summer cocktail?

No need.  The Sparkling wine and natural watermelon adds enough sweetness.

 

Other Great Cuss Kitchen Summer Cocktails

Refreshing Frozen Cocktail of Grapefruit, Vodka, Triple Sec, and Campari with white orchid next to it and a lime sliceBlushing Ho  Enjoy this irresistible summer cocktail.  Featuring Vodka, Triple Sec, Campari Liqueur, and Ruby Red Grapefruit juice (for Tartness…get it?) served up deliciously in a slushie creation- truly tantalizing.

 

 

 

key lime pie flavored martiniShameless Tart  The Shameless Tart is  a tropical blend of Coconut Rum, Vodka, Agave, Heavy cream, Vanilla,  and Key limes- finished with a crushed graham cracker rim, and a lime wedge or wheel.  Tart, sweet and creamy, you’ll be asking if its a cocktail or a dessert- but I bet you can’t have just one!   It’s a tropical vacation on your tongue and the cocktail version of your favorite pie!


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5 Responses

  1. I didn’t consider myself a DIVA (but I’ did take the test) Hilarious!

    But- I enjoyed this drink
    Ty- great site – sharing with my friends

  2. I love watermelon and basil. I also love Prosecco- so I knew this drink was for me.

    The smashed Diva did not disappoint! Yum

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